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HUMOR: “May I Speak to the Head Hog at the Trough!” by James Hewett

PIG CARTOON

SERIES: FRIDAY HUMOR #9

A MAN CALLED AT THE CHURCH and asked if he could speak to the Head Hog at the Trough. The secretary said, “Who?” The man replied, “I want to speak to the Head Hog at the Trough!” Sure now that she had heard correctly, the secretary said, “Sir, if you mean our pastor, you will have to treat him with more respect-and ask for `The Reverend’ or `The Pastor.’ But certainly you cannot refer to him as the Head Hog at the Trough!” At this, the man came back, “Oh, I see. Well, I have ten thousand dollars I was thinking of donating to the Building Fund.” Secretary: “Hold the line-I think the Big Pig just walked in the door.”

-James Hewett, Illustrations Unlimited

Charles R. Swindoll. Swindoll’s Ultimate Book of Illustrations & Quotes (pp. 534-535). Kindle Edition.

 

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My Money or God’s Money?

*Treasure Principle Keys From Randy Alcorn

 Jesus, “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:21).

Key Principle: “You can’t take it with you—but you can send it on ahead.”

Key #1: God owns EVERYTHING. I’m His Money Manager.

“We are the managers of the assets God has entrusted—not given—to us.”

Key #2: My HEART always goes where I put God’s money.

“Watch what happens when you reallocate your money from temporal things to eternal things.”

Key #3: Heaven, NOT Earth, is my home.

“We are citizens of a ‘better country—a heavenly one.’”

Key #4: I should live not for the DOT but for the LINE.

“From the dot—our present life on earth—extends a line that goes on forever, which is eternity in heaven.”

Key #5: GIVING is the only antidote to MATERIALISM.

“Giving is a joyful surrender to a greater person and a greater agenda. It dethrones me and exalts Him.

Key #6: God prospers me NOT to raise my standard of LIVING, but to raise my standard of GIVING.

“God gives us more money than we need so we can give-generously.”

*Adapted from Randy Alcorn’s Book “The Treasure Principle”

Randy Alcorn is the founder and director of Eternal Perspective Ministries, a nonprofit ministry devoted to promoting an eternal viewpoint and drawing attention to people in special need of advocacy and help. Randy was a pastor for fourteen years before starting this ministry and is a popular church and conference speaker. He and his wife live in Gresham, Oregon and are the proud parents of two daughters, Karina and Angela, and the grandparents of four grandsons.

A popular fiction author, Randy has held readers spellbound with fast-paced, gripping fiction infused with eternal themes. His books Edge of Eternity, Deadline, and Dominion, and Deception all point readers to the truth that the choices we make have eternal consequences.Lord Foulgrin’s Letters and The Ishbane Conspiracy tackle the subject of spiritual warfare and are meant to help equip Christians to recognize and resist the attacks of the enemy. Safely Home asks the question “Are you ready to die for your faith?”

Randy is also passionate about life and has written Pro-life Answers to Pro-Choice Arguments, a book that has been widely used to train students and adults to articulate the pro-life position in a secular culture. He often speaks on pro-life related themes and has included them in his novels.

Randy’s other books include The Law of RewardsThe Treasure PrincipleThe Grace and Truth ParadoxThe Purity PrincipleHeaven, and Wait Until Then.

Randy’s life emphasis is on 1) communicating the strategic importance of using our earthly time, money, possessions, and opportunities to invest in need-meeting ministries that will count for eternity; and 2) analyzing, teaching, and applying the moral, social, and relational implications of Christian truth in the current age. Visit Randy’s blog at http://www.randyalcorn.blogspot.com.

 

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